Aphrodite and my ongoing hunt for a wand that does other cool stuff

Today I’m talking about the Aphrodite Infrared Rechargeable Massager but as has become my habit of late, I’m going to tell you a bit about my relationship to products of this ilk first. So, you’ve spent any amount of time on this site at all, odds are you’ve noticed that I really, really, love wands. They are kind of my thing. In my time in this industry I’ve watched an explosion that took us from a world where there was one well-established “you HAVE to get this one” wand and a whole bunch of questionable ones that only the die-hard industry veterans and toy reviewers could identify to a place where there are multiple reputable, quality wands that I have no qualms about recommending. Here’s the thing, though, I still want more.

Lately I’ve found myself interested in wands that do other stuff too and I just keep getting thwarted. There was a wand massager with e-stim capabilities that I was super-late to the party on and thus it was discontinued by the time I noticed it. There was a wand with hot and cold capabilities that was actually on my to-do list in 2014 (I used to make one every year!) that no one I worked with was carrying and then I finally hunted down on the clearance table of a Vancouver, BC shop, joyously purchased, and then watched with alarm when all the fun functions stopped working immediately.

I have not had much luck in this quest.

This all leads us to the Aphrodite Infrared Rechargeable Massager a two speed massager with infrared heat.

So, here are the details on the Aphrodite:

  • It’s part of the Dr. Laura Berman Intimate Basics line.
  • It’s rechargeable
  • It’s designed for muscle relaxation and erogenous zone stimulation
  • The head is said to have a flexible joint (We have different definition of “flexible”, I think)
  • It comes with 3 silicone covers, each with a different texture for one side of the head
  • The other side of the head is where the heat comes form
  • It has 2 speeds of vibration one of which (the lower one) includes infrared heat

So, what do I think?

To be perfectly honest, this massager is just not strong enough for me. I probably should have seen that coming but, in my hopes of finally finding a wand that did other stuff too, I decided to just hope for the best. But, alas, there was no pleasure to be had for me.

Then, always the optimist (and frankly, obsessed with using sex toys for non-sex-related purposes) I thought “well, my upper traps are frequently tense and tight, perhaps the warming would feel good there”. Sadly, that was when I realized that the warming feature only works on the lower setting — a setting that registers as annoyingly ineffective to me– and then takes a bit to get going so I’m left with a pretty loud thing buzzing along as I wait to detect any form of heat at all. Far from the sensually warm wand massager I was craving, the Aphrodite was, for me,  pretty unsatisfying. So, my quest for a wand that does other fun stuff carries on.

Brass tacks, do I recommend the Aphrodite?

I hate doing this but, I have to say no. Typically I can say “well, I need super-strength and that’s not necessary for everyone” but, honestly, I can’t think of a situation in which I would recommend this product. That said, if you are looking for a wand to love, here are some of my favorite wand recommendations:

The Aphrodite Infrared Rechargeable Massager has since been discontinued.

Thank you to the folks at LuvToyz.com for sending me the Aphrodite Infrared Rechargeable Massager to test.


I received this product free of charge in exchange for my honest review.  My review policy is simple: I will never lie about liking a product if I don’t but when I do like something it’s hard to get me to shut up about it.

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